1. Separating judgments from objective facts.
Posted: Mon Jan 06, 2025 6:59 am
Let's see how we can travel along these 4 paths:
As humans, when faced with an event, we will be invaded by thoughts about what is happening. It is advisable to put them aside and focus on what exactly has happened: it is not the same to say: "we have been waiting for you for 20 minutes to start the meeting" than to say, "ugh, you are so late."
2. Express how we feel about that circumstance.
Here we have to draw on our broad emotional vocabulary and choose the emotion that best fits our feelings: "angry, helpless, sad...", it is not enough to say, you make me feel good or bad. An example would be, "when I see that you don't arrive on time for the meeting, you make me feel helpless, since there are many of us who waste time waiting for you."
3. Express what our need is and ask for a change in behavior.
“I need you to change this nepal phone data behavior and, from now on, arrive on time to meetings.”
4. Acknowledgements.
"I really appreciate you making that effort."
What do we gain by walking along these paths?
That the person is motivated to change, that he responds to our request vs. reacts abruptly, that communication flows and that we manage to express our need without hurting. In short, improving communication, assertiveness and creating closeness with others.
It is true that it is up to the other person to agree to our request or not, that is something that is beyond our control.
Finally, it should be noted that words are not innocent, words create realities, and that is why we must be very careful when selecting them. As Dr. Miguel Ángel Ruiz said in his book “The Four Agreements”: “Be impeccable with your words.” Taking care of our communication can be the first step when it comes to promoting our work.
As humans, when faced with an event, we will be invaded by thoughts about what is happening. It is advisable to put them aside and focus on what exactly has happened: it is not the same to say: "we have been waiting for you for 20 minutes to start the meeting" than to say, "ugh, you are so late."
2. Express how we feel about that circumstance.
Here we have to draw on our broad emotional vocabulary and choose the emotion that best fits our feelings: "angry, helpless, sad...", it is not enough to say, you make me feel good or bad. An example would be, "when I see that you don't arrive on time for the meeting, you make me feel helpless, since there are many of us who waste time waiting for you."
3. Express what our need is and ask for a change in behavior.
“I need you to change this nepal phone data behavior and, from now on, arrive on time to meetings.”
4. Acknowledgements.
"I really appreciate you making that effort."
What do we gain by walking along these paths?
That the person is motivated to change, that he responds to our request vs. reacts abruptly, that communication flows and that we manage to express our need without hurting. In short, improving communication, assertiveness and creating closeness with others.
It is true that it is up to the other person to agree to our request or not, that is something that is beyond our control.
Finally, it should be noted that words are not innocent, words create realities, and that is why we must be very careful when selecting them. As Dr. Miguel Ángel Ruiz said in his book “The Four Agreements”: “Be impeccable with your words.” Taking care of our communication can be the first step when it comes to promoting our work.